The Plan

Today I just want to dream about the future. And what it will be like to have the novel finished and the plot complete. The novel has surprised me so much already that I know there are many twists and turns waiting for me. And how will it be-how awesome—if they twist together in a whole form. An actual novel with a beginning, middle and end. Something to be proud of. Something I can polish until it shines. And something I can sell and actually have it be bought and published and put a nice hard cover with a spine around my words. What would that be like?

I have so many dreams about it. idealistic sure but they keep me going.

And what about this next scene. I have avoided writing. I have watched TV, I have done anything that didn’t involve sitting alone with the computer struggling with how to make it work and to figure out the all important WHY. Motives.

Motives have been hounding the end of my book.

It’s got such an odd shape, my book. Not sure whether it’s allowed. But the one people use seems so formulaic. Create an issue, allow them to solve it but the solving it makes everything worse. But everyone does that sort of escalating story. But my story is more of a journey and my MC is never in any danger. She’s just wandering around discovering things about the world and her past and her people. But she has nothing at stake, other than to stay hidden until the next book. So is the journey interesting to anyone else? and is it possible to add in the stakes later?

Are they required?

So back to dreaming… about being done and having space from what the story actually is, not from how it exists in my mind. Space enough to figure out what needs to be fixed, has to be fixed, and how to fix it.

So I guess it’s time to recommit to this again. to not be afraid to show up and stare at the blinking cursor. There is a story there and stories can be fixed. The rough draft can be horribly bad, it just needs to be finished.

So I’m recommitted so that I have something to show for all this work some day. So the math isn’t so good but that’s okay, math has never been my friend. I just need to start showing up more often. And somehow stay off the web at work. and stop re-reading how other people did it. I know how they did it—they showed up and they fought their way through it.

Ok, so until it’s done… I need to show up. every day. I need to post my intentions every day. even if it’s just in a journal entry, not on the blog. And I need to fight to meet those intentions every day.

So today I just have time to smack myself around for losing today to a TV festival. Not cool.

Tomorrow it’s time to focus again. Start writing a scene every day. or at least struggle with a scene every day.

So unti tomorrow... I can't wait to post tomorrow. And to actually give myself time to focus on the next scene. Always it should be about The Next Scene.