And more problems with plot line

I've been strongly inclined to replot the whole thing but that way lies insanity. I actually created a folder but the thought! just the thought, dread fills me.

anyway I'm not supposed to care about the quality of the story which means I can leave as is.

regardless the scene scheduled next doesn't interest me. i'll wait and see if it finds a place organically in the story otherwise, damn it, i'm excising the whole stupid subplot from my story and good freakin riddance, it's been nothing but trouble.

yup, not one positive thing to my story. humph. that sucks

the reason why I plotted out to the end is because I wanted to know I was getting somewhere. but ever since I've been constrained by it. I need to just write the next scene that happens.
Course I have no idea what that is except it should move the story toward TE already.

UPDATE: spent whole night trying to think of another storyline [as in completely different book] that would actually work.

85,024 (+88)

Only 88 words. But happy to refocus on what I need to figure out rather than revising old scenes. Definitely better way to go.

And I broke 85K.

black void of the subplot that just won't stay fixed.

Can nothing be simple??? !!!!

Even though it's right, it's hard to face all the changes. And I just can't seem to move forward without knowing what went before. It goes against all the rules though. Don't revise until it's finished. If you revise before you're done, you'll be caught in revision hell because later you'll think of something even more awesome and have to revise it all again.

Actually I don't need to revise. But I do need to figure out how K finds out about TU. If I do that, I should be able to move forward. Yay for writing it out, I love blogging :)

Major Breakthrough Eureka!

I shouldn't post but I'm excited. I've had a major breakthrough with "The Subplot." It was a matter of putting together a combination of characters that I hadn't thought of before. I'm not sure I understand the implications well enough but it's the FIRST one where it didn't make things instantly more complicated. It just feels right, finally!

I don't think I will be able to write the entire scene tonight. I feel shell shocked/distracted. I need to figure out how it ripples out over everything, what needs to expand or change. Woot, woot though! I'm going to keep plugging away, I just felt the need to cheer a bit. It's been such a stumbling block! SUCH a stumbling block. Now I need to figure out where that puts everyone. Then I can move forward.

As a side note: I actually haven't given the MC to be there yet but that'll be nothing now. Now I can strengthen the entire subplot up until this point. And part of that will be giving MC a reason to be nosey.

Goals for tonight

i avoided my project all day because I'm stuck. Unfortunately I didn't spend the day struggling with it.

I need to raise the stakes/give MC a reason to be there.
I need to figure out what happens once she's there.
Complete the scene. :)

An aside on nano

Nano is calling to me. I have never considered it before but this year it would mean two things: 1.) Very impt. It means I'm finally done with my book. 2.) It would mean I would get a significant amount done on my second book.

Well, if I'm done book 1 in the next 14 days or so, I'll certainly do Nano.

UPDATE: I find it to be a very interesting coincidence that I have 14 scenes and 14 days left in October.
For me, Nano would be the challenge of writing 1 scene a day for 30 days. So the rest of Oct would be gearing up to do the same thing.

Calling it a night

The next scene is still a black void. I am in the next scene by about 330 words but don't have clear idea what should happen. Just vague sketch. not enough

Updated word count: 84,778 (+1129)

and back and forth I go. From lovelies to black void to lovelies to black void again.

Oh, and note for tomorrow: Duh, still need to figure out why MC is being nosey. As in, RAISE THE STAKES ALREADY!!!

Lovelies, lovelies

One scene done. Oh, the lovelies. Explained some stuff that I wanted but changed something that I thought I'd figured out. But amazing thing, it fits something else that I love. And it hints at other lovely things. Oh how lovelies, oh how lovelies.

And now because it's an extra scene, I still have 15 scenes! Gah. And still need to figure out how to get to the next planned scene and what's going to happen there.

This book is going to be 200,000 words by the time I'm done.

But as for this scene, it was 811 words. And it was progress. So I'm all good with that!!

toehold??

"Book as event" has certainly creeped back in. Also I had't truly finished the last scene.
I added another paragraph but have no idea how to transition to the next scene. Also MC needs to talk to her friend and explain what happened. And then there needs to be a REASON why she goes to next scene. not just that she's nosey.

I'm adding another scene: transition scene. I'm pretty sure I will be losing some of the other scenes. They belong in another book I think.

Stuck in the void again

bleeding onto the page. that's the only way to describe it. technically i have written things. but not really actuallly anything.
this is a farce. how would i ever manage to make stuff up for a living?
ideas are so easy to come up with but taking the chars through their paces, page after page, is so difficult. if only i could see my scene and why it's necessary. i just can't get a toehold into it.

and there's nothing better than having a scene come out and just click for you.
that happened yesterday.
but today. it's staring at the black void again.
i don't care if it sucks. correction. i agreed not to care if it sucks. but blah, me no like boring. me no like tagging after people that i don't care about. And me don't understand how i'm going to tie up all the loose ends in the story i've got left.

i was reading this blog the other week from this full time writer, talking about how easy it is and how he doesn't understand why people try and say it's a difficult job. it's fun.
and then i read another blog where someone mentioned they didn't believe in writer's block just writer laziness. which means it is difficult. the reason we get lazy is because it's so difficult that it's easier just to shelve it and ignore it and hope the problem goes away and the muse figures it out while we're gone doing something else.

the guy who said it was easy said that if you are having trouble you are stuck in 'book as event'. which certainly i am. i wanted to publish it.

I have tried to take his advice and not care that NOTHING IS HAPPENING THAT I'M INTERESTED IN but blah.
i want to see the scene as a movie. i don't know how to facilitate that. i wish i could get myself through this.

Novel Push Initiative- 15 total, 7.5 today

The same thing for yesterday goes for today: Just finish the damn, stupid thing and move on!

Today my goal is 7.5 scenes. About 7500 words.
(My biggest total ever in a day has been 2500 words but I've never spent a whole day at the computer before either.)

No internal editor, I don't care how stupid or pointless it is. Just write the 7 scenes as quickly as I can.

Update... new total 83,649

One scene down. +1093 words.

Only 4000 words to go in my goal for tonight, hah, that's all! and it's 10:55 pm!!!

Oh and 15 planned scenes left total. progress, progress.

I'd love to say I could write another scene but I'm just so dang tired. My little Novel Push Initiative will have to wait until tomorrow.

g'night me :)
and muse, I totally give you permission to make this the suckiest thing ever just so long as I get to say "T.E." I don't get to write it yet. but you know that thing you put after the next 15 scenes. and then we get to move onto another project and let this one sit. You know that one. That's all that matters. I really want to be able to write that and yell it. So just be sucky tomorrow and let's get a move on with this thing. thanks!!

Yuck and sigh

So here's my thought: lots of first novels suck.

Yup and there you have it.

So I should just finish the damn,stupid thing and move on.
Sigh, I had such high hopes for it too. But you know, it's the re-read. I really thought I would still like my story but no. no, no, no. I'm so sad.I don't want to write a kid's book but maybe that's all i'm capable of writing.

So I should just fnish the damn, stupid thing this weekend. Yah, that sounds like a plan. Just a big rush to the end. What the hell. What is that, 5 scenes a night, about 5000 words? Hah, no problem.

No internal editor, I don't care how stupid it is. At least I can move on!

Well I redid the subplot a little bit to take out the ridiculousness. But it's still pretty weak. But it's less weak than before so I suppose that's progress

+645 new words, 173 of them in the next scene

decisions decisions...

Oh no it's actually Oct now. egads.

So that whole "I must finish" impetus just vanished. I'm stuck. pure and simple. I need to skip but my main plot line is at a lost place. and I'm not sure how to rip the sub plot out and I don't want to. I like the sub plot. I need to figure out how to keep it so that it doesn't contradict the other sub plot.

and oh I wish I was done.

@8:40
OK, so 30 mins to type the scene fast. I can fix it/change it later. But it'll be easier to rewrite the sucker later.